Accepting things that’s not meant for you takes a whole lot of time. As for me, it’s still unknown. Should I be happy for you? Should I be angry? Do I even have the right to be angry? In the first place, you’re with her even if you told me you’re not anymore. I always find it out myself, and now, I’ve found out something that is worse than the usual.
Maybe we’re not meant to be together. Even if a lot keeps on hoping that we are, and do I did too. It’s time to move forward and accept things. I know, I’ll find someone who’s meant for me, too.
As for you, I know how happy you are for having a wonderful child. It’s a blessing. Just be man enough for them. If you can’t and haven’t for me, at least for your own family, do it.
I’ve been stuck with this for a very long time. Pathetic, isn’t it? But every single day, I get to accept and move on with things that’s not meant for me. And one day, I’ll have someone and will be happier.
My favorite thing about relationships is the support. There’s someone who everyday will stand next to you and pick you up when you’re down, hold your hand and wrap their arms around you when they know you need them. And at the same time you can do that for them, you can put energy into making someone else happy, and caring for them.
I must admit, there are times that I tend to be so needy. It can extremely be annoying and pathetic. But it takes a lot of patience and understanding to handle me being this way.
I know very few things in my life, very few, but I can say with absolute certainty that I know and that I’m good at, and I am good at reading people.
Maybe it’s because I used to be quite and not talk and just watch people and I learned, or maybe it’s just a natural ability that some people have, but whatever the reason I am good at reading people. I know, I just know when I meet them, what kind of people they are, I know it in my gut. I don’t know how I do it, it’s the way they talk, what they talk about, how them move, what they wear, their expressions, I just know. And I know, I know with you I’m not wrong. You are good I know that. You’re good, and decent and rare, and I was stupid to let you go. I didn’t know what I know now, about life about everything.
I didn’t know. But I know now.
Every goodbye is a start of a new beginning they say. I must admit, I suck with goodbyes. More of I get stuck with it, and it feels like my other foot is stuck in a pile of mud that I can’t take off.
As I grow mature every single day, contemplating about life, learning lessons from every experience, I’ve already came to a point where goodbyes should be taken positively and be thankful that it happened.
I’m always thankful for every learning experience every pain and heartache would cause me. Sounds ironic but it makes me a better person. A person who already has an idea on how to take things when it’s already falling and failing. A person who makes a positive out of the negative. A person who is mature enough to know where and when to stop and let go. A person who knows now that not every love story has a happily ever after.
After few years, I can finally say I’ve grown a lot. Couldn’t be any more proud of myself. But yeah, it may hurt. It may be difficult. It may make my waking days hard for me (Duh). But at least, not for too long because I know one day, I’ll be back on track again. More mature and stronger.
One thing’s for sure, I’m a lot happier now. At peace and serene.
Goodbye painful days, goodbye heartaches.
Next story please.
May.21.13
0 notes